Now this was a shame. On Friday February 13th Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper assaulted Quebec icon Bonhomme outside Hôtel de Glace near Quebec City. The visit started out promisingly enough

But only minutes later the Prime Minister caught Bonhomme by surprise when he viciously kicked him in the stomach as he accused Bonhomme of being in league with Canadian scientists. It's well known that Canadian scientists have been repeatedly muzzled on the subjects of climate change and other environmental concerns during Harper's time in office.

"Harper has tightened control over what scientists tell the press, and when. A leaked internal analysis from Environment Canada in 2010 found that media coverage and requests on climate change fell sharply over three years. 'Media coverage of climate change science, our most high-profile issue, has been reduced by over 80 per cent,' the document said."

In 2014 The Climate Change Performance Index (published annually by Germanwatch and Climate Action Network Europe) labelled Prime Minister Stephen Harper and his Australian counterpart Tony Abbott the "earth's worst climate villains."

Moments after Friday's unsportman-like attack, Bonhomme, having recovered from his initial surprise, wrestled Harper to the ground and dunked his face in the snow several times. "That's from the polar bears," Bonhomme reportedly declared in French. He was quickly restrained by RCMP who pulled the Prime Minister to safety.

 I'm currently awaiting a revision letter for my new contemporary young adult book, The Sweetest Thing You Can Sing, and getting ready to leave the future behind me, at least for now (science fiction is far too captivating for me to make the goodbye permanent!). As you can see, I made a few cosmetic changes to the website to reflect the return to contemporary fiction. But before I completely leave 2063 and the U.N.A. in my wake, I wanted to discuss some of the science behind Yesterday and Tomorrow. Many of the forces that define the North America of 2063 in Yesterday and Tomorrow — global warming, nano-medicine, the ubiquitous presence of full immersion virtual reality, and the widespread replacing of human workers with robots or other technologies — are highly possible given where we stand today. As the rate of technological change and climate change increases, we're in for a wild ride.

Growing up in the 70s and 80s, by the twenty-first century I expected many changes that haven't come to pass — flying cars, much more extensive space exploration than humanity has actually accomplished, sophisticated robots (or should I say Replicants?), and cures for countless deadly diseases that still plague us. Meanwhile things I never expected have either greatly impacted our daily lives or loom large just around the corner. I'm chiefly talking about two things — how intertwined our "real" lives have become with the Internet and other technologies, and the enormous threat climate change presents to most living things on our planet. Bizarrely, even now that the threat is well recognized, we've barely begun to respond to the problem, and procrastination will only make our future direr.

CLIMATE CHANGE

In March the Nobel Peace Prize-winning Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change will issue a report on global warming. A draft of that report was leaked in November 2013 and stated that, "Many of the ills of the modern world - starvation, poverty, flooding, heat waves, droughts, war and disease - are likely to worsen as the world warms."

"Throughout the 21st century, climate change impacts will slow down economic growth and poverty reduction, further erode food security and trigger new poverty traps, the latter particularly in urban areas and emerging hotspots of hunger. Climate change will exacerbate poverty in low- and lower-middle income countries and create new poverty pockets in upper-middle to high-income countries with increasing inequality."

A recent University of Hawaii study projects that world temperatures will be off the charts hot come 2047, with various cities reaching the boiling point much sooner. Kingston Jamaica will be likely be permanently off-the-charts hot in just a decade with Singapore following in 2028, Mexico City in 2031, Cairo in 2036, Phoenix and Honolulu in 2043, San Diego and Orlando, Florida in 2046 and New York and Washington in 2047.

According to study author Camilo Mora, "the 2047 date for the whole world is based on continually increasing emissions of greenhouse gases from the burning of coal, oil and natural gases. If the world manages to reduce its emissions of carbon dioxide and other gases, that would be pushed to as late as 2069. But for now, the world is rushing toward the 2047 date."

ROBOTS

We could call it the next industrial revolution and it's already under way. You can see it in stores and airports in the form of self-check-in/out terminals, in Amazon's Kiva warehouse robots, machine driven commuter transport like Vancouver's Skytrain, and the imminent closing of most London tube system ticket offices in favour of direct payment via contactless bank cards. Google has "just purchased Boston Dynamics, a company known for building walking robots for the military" and says "it wants to build a robotic army for the manufacturing sector."

Google and numerous car manufacturing companies have been working on self-drive car technology. "Rice University computer science professor Moshe Vardi says that in 25 years "driving by people will look quaint; it will look like a horse and buggy. So there go many of the approximately 4 million driving jobs out there. Same for sanitation, and those are just a couple examples of how physical jobs will be replaced."

A recent report from the Oxford Martin School's Programme on the Impacts of Future Technology concludes that 45% of American jobs are at high risk of being taken by computers within the next two decades. The authors of the study "believe this takeover will happen in two stages. First, computers will start replacing people in especially vulnerable fields like transportation/logistics, production labor, and administrative support. Jobs in services, sales, and construction may also be lost in this first stage. Then, the rate of replacement will slow down due to bottlenecks in harder-to-automate fields such as engineering. This 'technological plateau' will be followed by a second wave of computerization, dependent upon the development of good artificial intelligence. This could next put jobs in management, science and engineering, and the arts at risk."

VIRTUAL REALITY

Most of us already spend quite a bit of time in an alternate reality known as the Internet, or immersed in increasingly realistic videogames.

According to eMarketer's estimate of media consumption among U.S. adults, average time spent with digital media per day was set to surpass TV viewing time for the first time in 2013. "The average adult will spend over 5 hours per day online, on nonvoice mobile activities or with other digital media this year, eMarketer estimates, compared to 4 hours and 31 minutes watching television."

Because eMarketer estimates all time spent within each medium (for example if someone spends an hour watching TV while also multitasking on a tablet, the time would be counted as spending an hour with TV AND an additional hour on mobile) the overall figures are sky high. U.S. adults spent an average of 11 hours and 49 minutes with media each day in 2012, and were forecast to spend 12 hours and 5 minutes with media in 2013.

In terms of gaming, full-body virtual reality has arrived with Virtuix Omni and virtual reality headset Oculus Rift. Palmer Luckey, Oculus' founder, says, "I think in a few years, maybe a few decades depending on how lucky we are, we'll be able to get Matrix level virtual."

Given the above info, inventor and futurist, Ray Kurzweil's belief that, "by the early 2020s we will be routinely working and playing with each other in full immersion visual-auditory virtual environments. By the 2030s, we will add the tactile sense to full immersion virtual reality" doesn't sound at all far-fetched.

Kurzweil posits that, "There will be limited ways of adding the tactile sense to virtual and augmented reality by the early 2020s, but full immersion virtual tactile experiences will require tapping directly into the nervous system. We'll be able to do that in the 2030s with nanobots traveling noninvasively into the brain through the capillaries and augmenting the signals coming from our real senses."

NANO-MEDICINE

Kurzweil also says, "in 30 or 40 years, we'll have microscopic machines traveling through our bodies, repairing damaged cells and organs, effectively wiping out diseases. The nanotechnology will also be used to back up our memories and personalities...The full realization of nanobots will basically eliminate biological disease and aging."

We have a ways to go before reaching that Star Trek level of healing but clear progress is being made. "Scientists at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology have designed nanoparticles to target artery walls around the heart and release small quantities of drugs on a timed basis decided upon by a doctor beforehand."

"South Korean scientists are developing a new treatment for cancer that will be more efficient and less harmful than chemotherapy. A team at Chonnam National University has developed nanorobots that can detect and treat cancer cells in a way that avoids the harmful side-effects of modern drugs." Imagine, no more chemotherapy!

So if you were ever curious about where my ideas for 2063 U.N.A. society came from — here are the roots of the Bio-Net, gushi, robots workers creating mass human unemployment, and climate chaos rendering areas of North America almost uninhabitable. Roots that are firmly planted in the world of today.

It's not quite December yet and this morning the temperature felt like -16 degrees Celsius in the GTA. Brrrr. One exceptionally chilly February snow day years ago I industriously went out with my camera and took some photographs of the excessive amounts of snow in the area. Well, I took some snaps until either my camera or the batteries stopped working because of the cold. Anyway, I'm actually pretty much the same way; I don't function well in the cold. I was probably only outside for about three minutes this morning before my eyes started streaming. Generally my whole body tightens up, wanting to close in on itself in a futile attempt to keep warm, whenever I'm out walking in winter. Maybe my genetically Irish cells would naturally prefer more moderate temperatures?? I don't know. But I'm happy to be indoors again and happy that it's a gorgeous bright day. When the days are so short we really need the light whenever we can get it!

I'm home from the office unexpectedly early this morning and because I have this bonus time I want to share a few lovely reviews my books have gotten lately, as well as photos the organizer of the Oakville Defend Our Climate rally sent along of our local protest. I'm the one with the Canadian flag style sign.

On November 16th this is what the Defend Our Climate
movement looked like across Canada:

And the fight continues! In Washington-based Center for Global Development's assessment of 27 wealthy nations Canada came dead last when it comes to environmental protection. Also, for the second year in a row Canada has placed near to last in Germanwatch’s Climate Change Performance Index with only Kazakhstan, Saudi Arabia and Iran behind us. We have a hell of a lot of work to do to dig ourselves out of this hole!

Finally, here are links to three reviews from the past couple of weeks which I'm extremely grateful for:

Ivy Book Bindings on Come See About Me: “From beginning to end, this book drowns you in a sea of complex emotions, its prose evocative and strangely compelling, despite its subject matter. Moreover, while Martin's stark realism can be difficult to swallow at times, it is a much appreciated slap into reality. Come See About Me won't be a book for everyone, but as a reader who actively seeks gritty novels that are deserving of their "realistic" tag line, this novel was a godsend.”

Frampton Books on Yesterday: “With an engaging and vivid writing style and multi-layered plot Yesterday is a far more accomplished novel than some of it’s more well-known contemporaries and deserves to be read by a larger (and older!) audience.”

CM Magazine on Tomorrow (Yesterday Book #2): “Martin obviously understands intrigue and knows how to construct a story that leaves readers wanting more with each passing chapter. She also manages to cover difficult and nuanced topics of sexuality and race, as well as environmental destruction and international warfare, with a light touch. ”

I can't tell you how thrilled I am that CM Magazine has called Tomorrow “Highly Recommended” and “very much worth seeking out.” Just thinking about it could almost keep outdoor cold from hunching me into my ordinarily tense posture.

And now I'm going to get down to writing while there's still some sun in the sky to power my efforts. Happy Friday!

When I grew up there were alot of TV commercials and school messages about the dangers of littering. The below is an American PSA we'd also catch up here in Canada that'll give you an idea about the focus.

So, okay, leaving your pop cans and candy wrappers lying around forests and stuff was a bad thing. We learned that. What we didn't learn about was the potential for human activities to wreak havoc on longterm weather patterns, putting human lives and the lives of numerous other earth species in jeopardy. And most of us still live our lives as though we don't know that's happening. It's a terrifying thing that we don't want to focus on and/or feel helpless to change. I feel the same. What can I do? I put my name to environmental petitions, I recycle, don't own my own car, I replaced my old lightbulbs with supposedly more environmentally friendly ones when that idea became all the rage (it may not have been such a smart one after all because it turns out Canada's "mercury-waste facilities are either patchwork or non-existent" but that's another story).

But when it comes down to it, what can I do that will make a real difference? I don't have great power or influence. Probably not even medium power or influence. And I'm certainly not single-handedly saving the planet by taking my Coke cans and old newspapers down to the apartment's recycling room.

So what does change things? Mass pressure on the politicians and corporations who possess real power. Right now those people don't believe enough of us are concerned about things like climate change, pipelines running through our communities and the destruction of ecosystems to warrant changing our society's toxic ways. There will be more hurricanes like Sandy and typhoons like Haiyan. Greater and greater disasters occurring with more frequency, if we don't make our voices heard on the issue of climate change now.

One way you can make your voice heard is to take part in one of the over a hundred Defend Our Climate rallies happening in communities across Canada on Saturday, November 16th. Stephen Harper and the Conservative party have had their heads buried in the {dirty oil} sands long enough. It's time for Canada to wake up to reality.

I'll be outside my local MP's office with a sign in my hand on Saturday...but it will mean so much more if you're there too!

As in years of yore, I've scanned in the Prime Minister's annual Easter card so Canadians who happen to be out of the country or who didn't receive their greeting before the holiday can see what Stephen's up to.

This Easter Prime Minister Harper will be on-site at the Alberta Tar Sands handing out Easter chocolates to animals whose habitat has been destroyed by the Tar Sands and the numerous children worldwide whose futures have been put in jeopardy by the plundering of our environment. Just look for the Syncrude signage if you want to know where to go to collect your free chocolate. There will also be a hunt for Canadian democracy (likely lying at the bottom of a toxic tailing pond) and Tar Sands Easter decorating competition. So you gotta know that will be a wicked fun time! Get your pastel paints and scuba gear ready.

* CAUTION: The Government of Canada and Syncrude are not responsible for death, dismemberment or illness suffered in conjunction with this offer.

Additional Harper greeting cards, action figures, and promotional photos available here.  

Did you happen to see the report released by the Conference Board of Canada six weeks ago that revealed Canada dumps more garbage per capita than any other country in the developed world? Additionally, its water use is almost double the average of other countries. In the report entitled "How Canada Performs - Environment" Canada was ranked 15 out of 17 countries. Only the United States and Australia's performance were worse.                      

And do you happen to remember the annual Climate Change Performance Index results released in December by Germanwatch and Climate Action Network Europe? "Canada fell to 58th place out of 61 countries analyzed for their policies and action on climate change this year, trailed only by Kazakhstan, Iran, and Saudi Arabia." It's embarrassing and unconscionable that a country of Canada's wealth and natural beauty should behave with such recklessness and disdain for the natural world, our home.

It's this disdain that so often in recent years leaves me feeling acutely embarrassed to be Canadian. I would like to apologize to the rest of the world for our brazen disregard for the environment, only apparently they don't care either.

That's right, nobody much cares. A global poll of nearly 23,000 people across 22 countries found that environmental concerns are at record lows. "Asked how serious they consider each of six environmental problems to be-air pollution, water pollution, species loss, automobile emissions, fresh water shortages, and climate change-fewer people now consider them "very serious" than at any time since tracking began twenty years ago. Climate change is the only exception, where concern was lower from 1998 to 2003 than it is now. Concern about air and water pollution, as well as biodiversity, is significantly below where it was even in the 1990s. Many of the sharpest falls have taken place in the past two years."

It's staggering. Wasn't this the year we saw Hurricane Sandy vomit the Atlantic Ocean up over New Jersey and New York? The summer of 2012/2013 was Australia's hottest on record, not in a nice let's drink our margaritas on the beach way but in a "catastrophic" fire threat one. Then there's Bangladesh. Experts predict that 250 million people worldwide will become climate refugees by 2050. Of those, 20 million to 30 million climate change refugees (likely the largest number from one place) are expected to be in Bangladesh, according to the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. Rising sea levels, a result of melting glaciers, could flood and/or erode 17 % of the country.

The human capacity for denial is seemingly infinite. Surely, at some point we must've been smarter than this? Otherwise how did we make it this far?

In the short term I guess as a Canadian I should be glad that generally people aren't as worried about climate change as they have been in the past, because it means this country can act like the asshole it apparently is without any worry about folks coming over to pelt us with rotten tomatoes and kick sand in our faces. As for our long term strategy, I can only conclude that Stephen Harper (our cyborg Prime Minister) is arranging safe passage to another solar system for all us Canadians. When the planet revolts against our abuse with a vehemence that makes daily living a struggle beyond our capabilities the Conservative Party's alien pals will whisk us away to a peaceful, unoccupied planet with an enviable bounty of natural resources. There, our descendants will be free to repeat our loveable old tradition of junking the planet with wild abandon. Hell, as long as Stephen Harper's at the helm, NHL is on the boob tube, there's Tim Hortons coffee readily available, and the bright promise of a new Target opening around the corner, millions of us Canucks may not even notice we've left earth.

The day after the big storm and it seems the rain hasn't stopped them from continuing industrious work on the parking garage beneath my building. They started fixing the expansion joints early in October and the construction is scheduled to be completed near to Christmas. I'm on day two of a headache but it seems churlish to complain about drilling noise when the power is on, the streets outside aren't flooded and here in Southern Ontario we're not having to deal with anything remotely like the damage some states have seen.

The images from New York City are particularly sobering— and what a job ahead to clean up and put all the pieces back together again. The scope of this is to difficult to fathom.

Earlier today I read a New Yorker article, "Watching Sandy, Ignoring Climate Change" which discusses the harsh realities bearing in on us, whether we're ready to deal with them or not. Between the memory of summer drought barely behind us, the destruction Hurricane Sandy's wrought as well as the results of a new Munich Re study, it's difficult to understand how nations that like to consider themselves enlightened (I'm looking at you Canada) continue to be in denial re. global warming and their part in it. "Nowhere in the world is the rising number of natural catastrophes more evident than in North America. The study shows a nearly quintupled number of weather-related loss events in North America for the past three decades, compared with an increase factor of 4 in Asia, 2.5 in Africa, 2 in Europe and 1.5 in South America."

We're not like Middle-earth elves, we have no Undying Lands to retreat to once we've junked up this planet. Yet we're still not giving the global warming issue the focus it should demand. What does it take, I wonder?

We need sea change and we need it now. Or better yet, yesterday.

Speaking of which, if you'd like to talk to me about my latest book (or anything else), I'll be spending next week (November 5 - 9) at Random Buzzers. If you want to read more about the book, two fantastic recent reviews are available at Midnight Bloom Reads and the School Library Journal blog. My local paper also did a nice write-up on Yesterday and me.

More importantly, I hope everyone's safe and remains that way and that you all impart to businesses and politicians at all levels how important protecting the environment is to you. Because unless we can strike up a deal with those Middle-earth elves, this planet is all we've got.

Frodo and Sam watch the elves leave Middle-earth for the Undying lands.

This is going to be a mighty short entry because there's lots to do today including the Spain vs. Italy match (which I'll be watching later), writing (I hope!) and Canada Day celebrations. But for months I've been chomping at the bit to put up the Yesterday trailer and now that Random House Canada's posted it to their Book Lounge YouTube channel, it's gone public. Hurrah!

The irony that I'm posting a trailer about a book where there is no more Canada on Canada Day doesn't escape me. In Yesterday this is just one of many, many things that's wrong with the future and I fervently hope that never comes to pass. During the last few years, though, it's become increasingly obvious that we have to fight if we want to keep this country something that we can be proud of—fight the small-minded people that want to stamp on our civil liberties and destroy our natural environment, fight to keep our healthcare and education systems strong, fight the ever-growing divide between the rich and the poor. The future is far from assured and that "stand on guard" sentiment has to be more than something we just pay lip service to. Canada Day is a celebration, to be sure. It should also be a battle cry.

Yesterday we went to the beach, sat on the sand and watched the waves. It was a little windy walking along the promenade but down on the beach it was perfect. Sublime really. I took off my shoes and socks and buried my feet in the sand.

And the date was March 11th which still seems unbelievable (the warmest March 11th since 1977). If I've ever sat on the beach in March I don't remember it. Everyone was out with their dogs, their kids or their significant others, eating ice cream and smiling out from behind their sunglasses because, yep, it looks like we killed winter this year. A heady, scary thing. I don't like winter much myself and am as happy for the warm temperatures as anyone, yet I don't wish winter permanently dead because of what that would signify. Global warming — we're cooking ourselves.

An article in The Toronto Star last week cited research that showed "significant shortening" of the outdoor skating season across Canada. One of the co-authors of the study mentioned that Wayne Gretzky had learned to skate on a backyard rink and said that based on the research, it's highly possible "within four decades there will be very little to no outdoor natural skating in Canada with the exception of Winnipeg."

Linking the nation's obsession with hockey to the battle against climate change is a smart move, I think. Many of us in this country seem absurdly resistant to change. It's as though we believe (in ostrich-like fashion) that our natural resources are limitless and our reckless plundering of them can go on forever without any change of strategy (screw the animals, the trees and the bleeding heart environmentalists!). But hey, any suggestion that we may be forced to learn to skate indoors no doubt sets off alarm bells across our once frosty nation. So what do we do when our unwillingness to change in one area is directly countered by our unwillingness to change in another? Will we stop functioning entirely like those old Star Trek robots that couldn't hold two opposing ideas in their heads without short circuiting?

If so, I hope some more environmentally friendly country can come in and take charge. I'm looking at you Iceland, Switzerland, Costa Rica, Sweden and Norway! You can even install your own government here, if you like, as a significant percentage of us have already given up on democracy and won't mind, even when we snap out of our stupor. Like Wayne Gretzky, I learned to skate on a backyard rink (which my dad used to flood every year) so I think that qualifies me to issue the invitation.

And while you're at it, Iceland, Switzerland, Costa Rica, Sweden and Norway, you might want to set up some housing for what will be the former Conservative government in the middle of Alberta Tar Sands ground. Those folks love themselves some dirty oil and you'll be able to keep an eye on them there and prevent them from being a danger to others. Of course, you'll have to haul away the equipment first because their temptation to use it seems rather strong.

It's election time in Canada again but this is an election with a difference as it marks the first time in the history of the Commonwealth that a government has been found in contempt of Parliament (a penalty that theoretically could involve jail time). On March 21st a Commons procedure and house affairs committee tabled a majority report concluding the government was in contempt "for refusing to disclose enough information about the cost of several big-ticket items." The Liberals, NDP and Bloc Quebecois concurred and united in a non-confidence motion against the Harper Conservatives.

So not a first we can be proud of but then there hasn't exactly been alot to be proud of around these parts in recent years. According to Amnesty International Canada's global reputation as a human rights champion has been eroded. “No longer the champion, more and more Canada is perceived to be a country that is reticent to take a consistently strong stand for human rights. Sometimes Canada now is also seen as part of the problem, not the solution,” said Amnesty Secretary General Salil Shetty. The scathing Amnesty International report also notes that “On the home front, Canada’s human rights movement feels under siege. Never before have Canadian organizations worried so much that there might be consequences if they disagree publicly with the government on a human rights concern.”

As we move towards election day I know the nation is in dire straits when I find myself missing sweater vest Harper. At least back during the last election Steve-o was actively trying to convince Canadians that he was harmless (how could a guy in a sweater vest from Sears possibly be a serious threat to democracy?). But now it's as though he's figures that not enough of us care about democracy in the first place—that a significant percentage of Canadian voters are either NeoCon fanboys or apathetic and lazy enough not to want to be bothered by pesky little things like the environment, human rights, transparency, ethics and democracy. So these days Steve-o's dropped the sweater vest act and is sticking to alternately sneering and uttering the word "economy" like it's a chant.

Economy. Economy. Economy. I made the economy, damn it. And I can take it with me when I go too.

Or something to that effect. Which is a hoot because Steve-o was the last party leader to realize the Canadian economy was in trouble in 08.

How about this Stephen Harper gem from back in 2005: “When a government starts trying to cancel dissent or avoid dissent is frankly when it’s rapidly losing its moral authority to govern.” Coming from someone who has since prorogued Parliament twice (to avoid confidence votes he would've lost) and brought U.S. style media control to Canada that's downright hilarious.

Stephen still can't take any heat from the press and during his campaign stops is limiting national media to four questions a day which stands in marked contrast to the way NDP leader Jack Layton and Liberal leader Michael Ignatieff are running their campaigns. "Harper finds time to do one or two carefully staged photo opportunities each day...As with all such events, the people who come in contact with Harper are Conservative supporters or part of the planning."

If the Tories were to run an honest campaign it would look like this:

But then again, Steve-o hasn't really been hiding his feelings these past few years, has he? So maybe he's right about the NeoCon fanboys and folks that don't want to be bothered with democracy. I can only hope he's wrong about the number of them that are out there because I know there are quite a few of us who are livid that he's been able to continue tearing the country down for this long.

Some Additional Reality Check Reading on Stephen Harper

* Ten reasons to oppose the Harper candidate in your riding

* The Canadian Nixon (a 2008 article which is more relevant than ever)

* The Harper anthem: USA! USA!

* What if Harper's dream of a majority comes true?

I know that not all of you will be surprised by what I'm about to say—that some of my fellow Canadians have suspected for quite awhile now that there's something not quite right about our current Prime Minister, Stephen Harper. He possesses a startling amount of contempt for democracy, the arts, and the unemployed and the poor and doesn't even feel the need to conceal it. He also continually displays a complete lack of regard for the environment.

All of this makes sense when you know the truth, which is that Stephen Harper is a prince of darkness who will feed on Canadian democracy until it's no more. At that stage, one of his trusted minions will ship him off in a crate to some other apathetic country that doesn't have the will to defy him. As a vampire, Stephen requires no oxygen or water and is therefore not concerned with environmental damage caused by the mining of the Alberta Tar Sands or the cutting down of the Boreal Forest. This also explains why he doesn't support the long-gun registry. Unless you use silver bullets, firearms are no threat to him.

In fact, Stephen Harper's real name is Stephane Harperoux. Baron Stephane Harperoux left France at the onset of the French revolution in 1789 and has been feeding on democracy around the globe ever since. It's likely that his true identity would have been discovered much sooner if not for the extremely uncharismatic persona Stephane's adopted (most notable in his staid haircut and monotone voice).

But now, with Halloween coming up, you have the opportunity to personally validate my claims about Stephane Harperoux because every October 31st at the stroke of midnight there is one full minute during which Harperoux is powerless to conceal his true identity. At that time you will observe something like the photograph below, one I snapped at 24 Sussex Drive in Ottawa last Halloween before security ushered me out of the Prime Minister's residence in Ottawa.

I attempted to free Harperoux's cats before exiting the scene but they showed no interest in leaving. I hear Stephane actually treats them rather well and shows more respect for them than he does for his fellow Canadians. I urge you all to give this matter serious thought. Harperoux may well take good care of the nation's cats but the rest of us are not in good hands!

As an aside, I realize this news about Stephen Harper may disturb some people who have bought into popular culture's depiction of vampires as attractive and mesmerizing. Life might be like a box of chocolates but it's not like True Blood, The Vampire Diaries orTwilight!

Vive la liberté! Let's ditch this bloodsucker.

Like over 27,000 other Canadians across the country yesterday I was out protesting Prime Minister Harper's proroguing of Parliament. Stephen Harper would love for us not to care about the torture of Afghan detainees, about the dangers in refusing to battle climate change, about responsible limits to a Prime Minister's power. To care, he says repeatedly, marks you as a member of the elite or a leftwing fringe group. Indeed this is his chief retort to any criticism levelled against him. Say a word against him and/or his cronies and you are a bizarro dissident. But what does it mean if, as a leader, you can't handle any kind of dissent?

Ironically, Stephen Harper himelf answered this question back in April, 2005 when he proclaimed, “When a government starts trying to cancel dissent or avoid dissent is frankly when it’s rapidly losing its moral authority to govern.”

I suppose this means Prime Minister Harper would characterize his past self as a member of the elite or a leftwing fringe group! And the Harper of five years ago would probably be content to label his current self a fascist. If life were more like science fiction TV inevitably the paths of those two opposing Harpers would cross in an incident set during a rip in the time-space continuum and both be destroyed but real life is less convenient and means putting your mittens and boots on and marching through the streets in protest to try to set things right.

So kudos to all the concerned citizens throughout the nation (and those in London, England and various locations in the U.S. who showed up for local protests there too) for getting their message out to the Prime Minister yesterday! We do care, Stephen. Your recent prorogation of Parliament is undemocratic and we're not going to stand for it!

This was the scene at the protest in Toronto, beginning with me arriving at Dundas Square about twenty minutes before the rally:

The rally in Dundas Square in full swing:

Polar bears protesting on the march route up Bay Street.

Protesters passing Nathan Phillips Square:

Parliament in an open casket to the tune of bagpipes.

And here's a tiny bit of the march action from my Flip Video:

Meanwhile in Ottawa, Trevor Strong of the Arrogant Worms sang "The Wild Proroguer" at the protest on Parliament Hill (hilarious song and I love the King Steve-o puppet in the background!):

This time he's got some answering for indeed!

This was in the Toronto Star yesterday:

It's only been one day, but Canada has already garnered its first "fossil" award. The award, which is given to countries who are blocking progress at the United Nations climate summit, is awarded daily by a coalition of 400 international NGOs.

According to organizers, Canada was awarded a Fossil of the Day for its commitment to stand on its targets and not to negotiate them throughout the conference.

At a speech in Montreal on Friday, Environment Minister Jim Prentice said that he “wont be swayed by the Copenhagen hype.”

I'm sure Emperor Harper is still beaming with pride today, as all the rest of the Tories punch the air and rave about how they're not going to get suckered into helping save the environment because damnit that costs $ and we should be able to trash our own backyard if we want to, leave shamelessly heavy carbon footprints, exhaust natural resources etc. And who cares about polar bears, seals and other species anyway, they don't even pay taxes!

Yes, indeed we should be so very proud that our country, unlike more rational nations which would like the planet to continue housing us for a few more years, just doesn't give a sweet damn about anyone or anything except money (which will be used to construct Emperor Harper's future Death Star).

Emperor Harper and one of his minions supervise the destuction of the environment and the creation of dirty fossil fuel at the Alberta Tar Sands.

I've been saying for some time now that Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper is actually an evil Sith Lord:

* Say Yes to Carbon

* What Canadian Voters (Inexplicably) Want

* Stephen Harper: Ordinary People Don't Care about Arts Funding

* Tories Slipping From Majority

* Stephen Harper says, “These Aren't The Droids You're Looking For”

* Easter Greetings From Our PM

Funny how that fact seems to be more widely recognized abroad than it does in Canada. I'm not sure whether that means we're not too bright in this part of the world (brain freeze?) or whether we're just too apathetic. Either way, there's no denying that we royally suck.

As one close observer of of international climate change talks said leading up to Copenhagen, “Canada has become the Darth Vader of the G8 in particular. The marks they now get regularly from the environmental groups are last place.”

Yep, not only is Stephen Harper really Darth Harper underneath the suit, tie and wind-resistant hairstyle, if we keep letting Harper get away with steering Canada in the direction of doing as little as humanly possible to fight climate change we're all acting in support of the destructive Empire.

Do we need the Ewoks to come over here and kick our asses in order for us to realize what we're allowing to happen here?

Can I just remind you that I called this, people? Okay, I didn't nail the tunes and we're not in election season yet after all but you gotta admit that my powers of perception are impressive.

Stephen Harper and Yo Yo Ma. For real. Umm...yeah. Watch out for the Prime Minister's release of those Pitbull and Jason Myraz covers soon.

Not bad Steve-o but if you really want to rack up some cool quotient points you should try, oh, maybe repairing Canada's reputation as a peacekeeping nation, focusing on fighting the damage our country's inflicting on the environment or committing to battle child poverty.

I know, I know. You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one...

My week is off to a tremendous start as I won a copy of Cracked Up To Be in Courtney Summers' Last Lazy Galley Giveaway! I never win anything and I've been dying to read this since I tore through the first two chapters on her site. Not only do I get an early look at the book—I'll have my very own copy of Cracked Up To Be with the original (now a collector's edition) cover. How cool is that!

In other good news the trailer for I Know It's Over is up at Bookscreening.com where you can rate it. After the One Lonely Degree advance reader copy contest closes I'll be posting the trailer for One Lonely Degree (which is ready and waiting) on my website too.

I just got through voting voting in the Canadian federal election and if, like me, you're hoping that voters will block Stephen Harper from a majority (indeed, keep him away from the Prime Minister's office entirely!) it's going to be a looooong, suspenseful day.

If you haven't voted yet and are still undecided you should consider what New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman has to say in his new book Hot, Flat and Crowded: Why We Need a Green Revolution--and How It Can Renew America.

“The ability to design, build, and export green technologies for producing clean electrons, clean water, clean air, and healthy and abundant food is going to be the currency of power in the Energy-Climate Era – not the only one, but right up there with computers, microchips, information technologies, and planes and tanks.”

Doing nothing to safeguard the environment means being left behind in the dust (and smog). “Some see that now,” Friedman declares. “Others will see it soon. Eventually, it will be obvious to us all.”

The problem is we don't have time for the stragglers to catch up to reality and if enough of them don't get with the program TODAY, they'll be holding the entire nation back. Remember, we have a choice and we're making it for everyone. Vote for the planet. Vote for anyone but Harper. You can enter your postal code at AnyoneButHarper.ca to learn which party in your riding will keep Harper out.

“The Liberals' carbon tax plan will plunge Canada into recession, sparking economic unrest that will revive Quebec's separatist movement, Prime Minister Stephen Harper says.”

Harper's plan? Drill the hell out of the Alberta Tar Sands, continue clubbing them pain in the ass big-eyed baby seals, exploit the Arctic for whatever oil etc. it will give us. That gold-star plan along with Stephen Harper's cozy looking sweaters will keep us safe from recession and the separatist movement. With no more pooping puffin to rest the Tory campaign on I guess this is what we get: fear wrapped in cashmere.

To crib a line from Billy Bragg's Waiting For The Great Leap Forwards:

“Here comes the future and you can't run from it.”Our environment is already changing. If we're not bold in our plans to combat further environmental degradation we're going to have much bigger problems than separatism and the economy to deal with. This is life and death stuff—for us, for our descendants, for the birds, the bears, the trees. Closing our eyes to the threats won't make them disappear.

The time to act is now. Any political party that doesn't understand that is a party we should be afraid of.

I'm with Newfoundland Premier Danny Williams when he says: 'Anyone but Harper.' We don't have any time to spare getting the Conservatives out of power.

I like to keep in touch with Stephen Harper by email, you know, to remind him us peasants care about issues like the environment, the seal hunt and human rights. So far the Prime Minister hasn't emailed me back but I do receive the occasional form letter from whatever Minister his office has forwarded my complaint to. And of course there was Stephen's Easter card, which was interesting but a little unsettling.

So anyway, it's not like the PM and I never communicate. Why just yesterday I received a thoughtful message from him informing me that Liberal leader Stéphane Dion is a goofy French guy who wants to steal all my money (and yours) through his idiotic carbon tax plan.

To be honest, I found this a bit confusing at first. I'd been under the impression that Canada should take decisive action on cutting its carbon emissions. Of course, that was before I really had time to let the leaflet from the PM's office sink in. I mean, get a load of this wimpy Dion dude. The picture says it all. There's no need to even open the leaflet up and read about how "foolish" and "misleading" the carbon tax is. Obviously Dion doesn't understand what's good for Canada! I don't even think English is his first language—otherwise his name would be Stephen instead of Stéphane right?

Clearly Dion is a trickster and a loser! Or so I thought until the below leaflet showed up in my mailbox this afternoon.

Yep, Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper's transformation to Sith Lord is almost complete. Harper has zilch interest in imposing a carbon tax on his subjects but what do you want to bet there's talk of a Death Star tax on the horizon? Those gargantuan death stations don't pay for themselves, you know.

I can't believe he had me fooled—even for a day! Really, we should've guessed this was coming, what with the company he's been keeping from day one.

Sigh. Where are Han Solo, Princess Leia and Luke Skywalker when you need them? Yoda? Chewy? R2?

Following on from yesterday's post here's a recap of Canada's performance at the G8 from Make Poverty History:

We lagged behind other nations at this G8 summit, and the world took notice. While other countries like Britain, Japan and the USA offered significant new funding for climate change adaptation and the development of clean energy in developing countries, Canada has so far refused to contribute.

Canada was opposed to restating a commitment made last year at the G8 for the members to spend $60 billion on health programs for poor countries. The Canadian government wanted to take this promise out of this year’s final commitments, arguing it was too vague. In the end, Canada had to compromise under pressure from the other G8 countries. It worries me to think what might have happened if the Canadian government had got its way.

Canada, along with the US, also opposed mid-term targets for greenhouse gas reductions, so the G8 communique only talks about a 50% reduction target by 2050, a time when all the current G8 leaders will be long gone.

Disappointed? Click here to send a message to Prime Minister Harper and Minister Bev Oda urging them to do better the “next time they have the opportunity to demonstrate Canada’s leadership on the world stage.” An upcoming meeting on global poverty will be held at the UN in September, an excellent time to change their tune.

So the G8's latest climate change deal is a steaming pile of crap. Canada, the United States, Japan, Russia, Britain, Italy, Germany and France have agreed to try to halve worldwide emissions by 2050. I mean, hey guys, let's not knock ourselves out, right? By 2050 aliens will have arrived with their superior technology to help us out of this jam, surely!

Antonio Hill, spokesperson for Oxfam International, had this to say: “At this rate, by 2050 the world will be cooked and the G8 leaders will be long forgotten. Rather than a breakthrough, the G8’s announcement on 2050 is another stalling tactic that does nothing to lower the risk faced by millions of poor people right now.”

Why no mention of the aliens, Antonio? Gah, what's with the negativity?

Anyway, Canadians don't have anything to worry about because our nation topped the list of countries best equipped to endure climate change in a recent British study.

Andy Thow, one of the report's authors, says that Canada “scores well across all aspects of the index. This is because of the low pressure on natural resources resulting from a low population density and large land area, combined with high agricultural capacity, a healthy economy, few development and health challenges and excellent public institutions.”

Hmm, maybe this explains Stephen Harper's underwhelming dedication to battling climate change. We're sitting pretty up here. All you poorer nations can just wait for that alien rescue ship (it's on its way, really!)—us, we're going to sit back and enjoy some cool ones by the lake. It's *so* nice this time of year.